It was a boring saturday evening, Faruk, the flat mate had his girlfriend Ijeoma over, there was no hope of us playing the xbox360 lying beneath the TV of the living room. He’s playing mummy and daddy with the love of his life, while I endure the screams of ecstasy coming from the room beside mine….The soundtrack alone got my konji hormones doing Windeck!, Junior even rose to the occasion…I had to satisfy him or get a drink to take my mind off the sudden urge of kpoxing
Stepped into the kitchen, hailed Morufu the house rat peeling one of the plantain I got from the market earlier. *That rat get liver sha*…. opened the refrigerator, to my dismay, there was no single bottle of alcohol available…Looked at Morufu, he shook his head, meaning he wasn’t responsible for the missing bottle of Udeme..*na God save that rat*… My best option was to head to Heartbreak Bar, where singles drown their sorrows in alcohol and hook up with random guys/girls for a moment/night of pleasure. This way I can get high as well as solve Junior’s Konji issues…killing two birds with a stone #Winning
The bar was barely packed when I got there, it was just me, Suraju the bartender who greeted me and gave me my usual…Udeme… while I scanned the joint for a potential damsel in distress.. The scene was dulling…15mins later, 2bottles gone, the ladies started coming in, one by one while I assessed them…too fat, too short, too thin, too razz…then I thought to myself..I should have a few more bottles…40minutes at the bar, 4bottles and counting, my thirst problem was solved but Junior refused to go down, he is a very hard guy when he makes up his mind every chick looked the same, I must have sworn I saw Amber Rose and Megan Good at the bar sef.
Then I spotted her at the corner of the bar nursing a huge bottle of Heineken, walked up to her in my semi-inebriated state. Introduced myself and asked if I could join her, she obliged. Her name was Ronke, she just found out her boyfriend was cheating on her, I gave her a shoulder to cry on…ordered another round of beer for both of us. By now I was on my 5th bottle….I was a total weist!… Asked if she wanted to come home with me, she agreed..Junior was grinning from cap to cap…he’s finally gonna get some action instead of lotion and lux soap.
We started kissing as soon as we got to my place…*even Morufu the rat dey hail me*…., Junior was rearing to go…after kissing me, she went down on Junior, kissing him passionately and slowly..I mean the babe was a pro…Junior wasn’t gonna budge after 5mins of her lips on him while I caressed her titties and explored her wet pussy with my left index finger and thumb….Junior wasn’t gonna succumb to just a BJ he was still as solid as Olumo Rock, he wanted a piece of the action…..I’m sure it was the beer that gave him extra confidence…
Ronke was dripping wet and was begging for it, Junior was throbbing and rearing to go into the new territory…it was magic…the rest was history as I was wasted and I have no recollection of what happened…only Junior knows as well as Ronke…all I was left with was gist from Faruk the following morning with a piece of paper with a phone number and note saying “we should do this again” which he said he got from a very huge *FAT* lady who left the house in the morning.
Shayo na bastard!
Disclaimer Notice
All Characters are purely fiction, in any event there’s a similarity to anyone both living, dead or zombie, it was just mere coincidence. If you don’t believe me, ask google….he knows all.
All grammatical blunders are mine…Thank you